Monday, February 18, 2008


Violet has learned not only how to say "pretty," but also
under-stands the meaning of it. 
Today she found a pair of underwear with purple & green lucky clovers on them, and saying "pff-teh" (her version of "pretty") to herself under her breath, took off with them  into the living room, stopping occasionally to hold them up under her chin and pose, looking down at herself, bedecked with pretty underwear.  When she came back in the kitchen 5 minutes later, she had managed to actually put them ON! They were around her neck, making her oh-so-pretty in purple and green 4-leaf clover underwear. She looked so proud, so demure, so coy, so took my breath away to see such a pure demonstration of Eve in my tiny daughter.
For years, Ben has maintained he wanted a daughter first. I was dubious, having much more of a fondness for little boys, for various reasons. I did not have the greatest experience being a Girl, myself, had always wished I HAD BEEN a boy, and also wanted a miniature duplicate of my husband to care for. 
Once we found we were pregnant with a girl, I had a couple of days of reconciliation to go through, dealing with all sorts of temporary emotion that was totally unexpected, and, though it lasted only a couple of days, was disturbing to me. I found I was just a little bit jealous, now that there would be two girls in Ben's life, vying for his attention, I thought. I was by no means ready to share him with another female. I had been looking forward to being the only girl in a family of boys, and thriving on the attention (I thought!) 
Ben, of course, was very pleased at the prospect of having a girl, and helped me reconcile myself to her....and, indeed, as the months passed, the little Precious became so much more real and by the time we chose her name, I was completely in love. However, even the first moments of her life, holding her tiny slippery body in my arms..... the tenderness of that time cannot compare to the pure delight and utterly possessive love I have for her a year later. She has grown SO much in that time, and, especially since Ben has been gone, has become my little companion, all mine! I miss her when she sleeps, I delight in hearing her voice from the other room, "Ma-Ma-Ma-Ma" and now, watching her becoming such a little Feminine just defies description. She literally takes my breath away on a daily basis. 
Ben, too, sometimes just *scrunches* up for the sheer explosion of tenderness at some of her antics. She has picked up a habit from him, saying, "Thank you" in sign language whenever she gives a kiss, because he thanks her when she gives him a kiss. So, it's *kiss* "Thank you" *kiss* "Thank you" *kiss* "Thank you" all day long......and it's just the CUTEST thing. She took his watch, and seemed to have a girlish instinct that it was to be worn as an Accessory, for when Da-Da put it on her wrist, she toddled around the house for an hour after, just holding her decorated wrist out in front of her gazing at it, whispering, "Pf-teh" over and over. 
We're totally in love with our Violet.


Herb of Grace said...

Awww, maaaaan... Now you've done it. I think we're going to have to have another girl... *sigh* I was just getting used to the idea of one of each, too.... Jeremiah going to have words with you!

The Beardsleys said...

Awwwww!! How cute!! I'm so glad to see another blog too!! I was telling Lisi, I keep checking and then feeling like 50% disappointed that there is no blog, and 50% excited that you and Ben are having such a good time, that there is no time for talking about it!!

We are thinking of you both (all 3 of you) and hoping that you are having a terrific time together!!

much love!