Thursday, January 15, 2009

Lots of Nothing

....nothing I can really post about anyway. The Army is sucking us dry these days, and I just wanted to send up a flare asking for prayer from those of you who read my blog. We're coming up to some hard, hard times these days, and but for God's grace and daily-renewed mercies, we would be buckling under. 

My health is in pretty shabby condition, too, which makes it just horribly impossible to have a cheerful attitude for my husband by the time he gets home from work. I sometimes feel like I have completely lost myself to FMS and the Army. My ideals as a wife and parent and Christian are just daily blown into crazy little bits like a leaf blower does to fall leaves.

God is teaching me to rely completely on Him, I know....for mental health, for happiness, for a sense of fulfillment, for success as a parent.....all those things I crave. God wants me to replace them with Just Him.

Samuel Morris prayed a prayer that I have printed out and framed in our office:
Lord, take the earthly things from my heart
and put in their place your Holy Spirit
so that I can neither think nor speak
anything but the Holy Ghost.

I have come to realize that even the things that I think are so good, so right, are also earthly. Family, Marriage, Friendships, Lifestyle, Parenting....these are the hardest to give up. 

Another good one, courtesy of Chris Robinson:

Lord, you are more precious than True Friends
Lord, you are more costly than Time,
Lord, you are more beautiful than Family,
and all that I desire is found in You.

As always, it is hardest to give up my husband and daughter, the precious family that is all mine, that I waited and hoped for for so long. 

But God--Who made them--is more satisfying.         He says.         ..........I believe.


Joy G said...

I'll pray for you today, my dear friend!

Edith said...

You don't know me; I just stumbled on your blog and I am not sure how. Maybe it's one of those things. However I'm a believer too and I'm sorry you're going through a rough time. We may never correspond again (although if you check out my blog we might...that's meant to be an encouragement, not a threat! but I'm praying for you too.