Monday, May 25, 2009


I already feel like a veteran of military marriage, and I've only been through one deployment. Ben and I just spent 9 days apart, he in Missouri, Violet & I in San Francisco visiting a friend. When it came time to say goodbye, we both just buckled down and did our part, I packed my bags and stayed out of his way, he packed his, and ......I cleaned up after him. :D Then we kissed and said, "See you in a week or so!" and off we went!

The week we spent apart did not always offer ample time for chatting on Skype or phone conversations long into the night. Instead, we sent the occasional text, skyped a couple of times, and mostly just let each other know we were happy, keeping busy, and loved each other from a distance. Thanks to Laurie & Matt's comforting presence, their godly, happy marriage (which I tended to bask in, with warm memories of my own), and their cheerful & swift disciplining style with their son---which put Violet and me greatly at ease, I hardly even knew I was gone! The 9 days flew by, and before I knew it, I was home again, cleaning house for my husband's late-night arrival!

Which brings me to the Point I was making in the beginning. Reunions. In the military, one grows stronger, I think, with each separation, and a groove is drawn into each person, creating the ability/technique to cope. However, when Reunion Time comes around, there is NO DIFFERENCE between the first one and the fiftieth one! A few hours before he comes home, I am dancing around the house, scrubbing everything with a toothbrush, checking my hair every 5 minutes, watching the clock, checking my phone, and twirling Violet around chanting, "Daddy's comin' HOME!" over and over again. Not one iota of that excitement has faded from when it all began. For that, I am grateful!

Praise God we get to experience these miniature honeymoons every so often! I thank the Lord for blessing our marriage with them.

Welcome Home, Ben, my Love.


Gramoni said...

What a beautiful description! And deep insight. God knows what He is doing.allilala

Matt and Laurie Beardsley said...

LOL, thanks!! I think! :-) I like your description particularly of our disciplining style! :-) Although I am definitely more cheerful with an audience!

And thanks for saying nice things about our marriage. I definitely am frequently convicted of having a complaining spirit, but it was very nice to talk about things to an understanding friend and to hear encouragement!

It sounds like as far as separations go, this one was short and sweet for both of you! Still not desireable but definitely time apart, well spent!

Hosanna said...

I wondered what had happened to you these past few days..... Say, if you don't scrub things with a toothbrush, would Ben notice? I just know that even if I did scrub things with a toothbrush any other cleaning brush, K wouldn't notice it. Now if it is over the top messy, he might; otherwise my husband doesn't notice or care about such things. Except when HE cleans something..... then he's like: "Did you notice that I bleached the toilet?" "Yes, and I noticed that half of the new bottle of bleach is gone...." :)
Great post.

Herb of Grace said...

Dittoes to Hos!! :D Toothbrush, shmoothbrush. As long as he can walk from the door to the couch in the evenings, without falling and breaking his neck, he doesn't notice the rest :)

Glad to hear he's back and safe and sound.

tess said...

LOL! Oh man, that's too funny! Tell me, did your hair get any better-looking between five min. checks? Maybe I should try it.

Hosanna said...

All kidding aside, Susi,I know what you mean. I have been thinking about this. It's not so much that your husband *expects* everything to be spotless and perfect, or that he would be grossed out if your hair was flat and you weren't wearing make-up, it's that us women WANT to please our men, and make their homecoming pleasant and comforting. For you it may be cleaning the house with a toothbrush and having perfict hair....for Lis it may just be getting the kid's stuff picked up so J doesn't fall over it; for me, it's having a nice meal, and a listening ear for a man who has been laboring outside in the heat all day on a farm. He expects nothing. But I think we do it as a love offering for our husbands who are out there providing for and protecting us. Nothing wrong with that!