Wednesday, September 23, 2009

So.

So, there's a new baby coming. :) God works....soooo mysteriously. If you had asked me 2 weeks ago about our move and Ben's deployment, and did a new baby fit into this at all, I would have answered in the negative. It just doesn't make sense for our family right now, I'd have said.

Huh. So, now I'm thinking about the next year. I'll have a 3 year old preciousness, a studio of a few students, I'll be pregnant (and hopefully *not* sick as a dog), and be bringing a new piece of preciousness into this "temporary" house of ours with its borrowed furniture. Ben won't be here, but when I do give birth, he'll probably come home for the delivery, and then a few short weeks later, he'll be back for good! Our newborn will get to know his/her daddy in a way Violet did not. Huh. It's just ....so......mysterious!

As my life unfolds before me, I'm struck by how utterly unpredictable it is, yet how retrospectively God-directed. There's always a variation of this thought: "So, wow, I never thought I'd be doing A, B, and C, but....yeah, I can see now how God would've worked that for us, and why He did! Thank you, Lord, for directing our lives!"

I'm looking forward to seeing old friends, I'm excited about getting back into teaching, I love having my sister just a mile down the road, available for coffee or the library at a moment's notice....I'm scheming about visits to long-unvisited family members, seeing places I've not seen in years......it's a good season. I miss my Ben, but again........I can see the Good Hand of the Lord at work in our lives. He is a merciful God. Merciful. I can see now, that He has *not* given our family more than we can bear. He has provided a Way.....and since the last deployment (the loooong, 15-month one) we are stronger, and we see His face more clearly through the fog of separation from each other.

I came across a letter I'd written Ben during the last deployment....and was reminded of how consistently sad I was, how very much I grieved over his absence (and ever-possible death) every single day. How different this time is. God has truly grown us stronger. Our marriage bond is stronger, deeper, our faith has the seasoned perspective of having a 15-monther under our belts.....Violet has made us closer, too. Having children does that to you. :) We both feel that Joy is actually available to us! Last time, I had not the strength to lift my arms in praise. This time, I know that I can, and while I don't do it consistently, I feel the strength to do it when God gives me the grace to remember!!

"Lift up the hands that hang down, and strengthen the feeble knees and make straight paths for your feet, so that the limb which is lame may not be put out of joint, but rather be healed."

God has accomplished this in our lives. Where we were weak, He has made us strong. It has taken years, but He has done it.


I am looking forward to this pregnancy.


And Christ's Return, which is the True Source of Joy.

10 comments:

Hosanna said...

Oh, Su, I'm so glad! So incredibly GLAD! I just can't begin to say how happy I am about this for you. :D
God knows what He's doing. And this might not have been your timing, but is His perfect timing. Yay! See ya tomorrow. "Bearing gifts, we traverse afar........" Indeed, bearing gifts. You have NO idea. I am LADEN with them. There WILL be tea and cakes, my friend.

Hosanna said...

Sorry, but I really want to know - WHAT DID BEN SAY?!
And, what does Violet think?!

Denise said...

Aww, what an incredible post dear friend!!!

God truly does work so many things we just can't fathom in our lives. So many things that pain us, and yet that mean to sanctify us. I was there with you, during both our Deployments #1... And yet my Infertility was my biggest pain and trial. God's spoken to me a lot about that season. I know we both know we can't "re-do" any of it... But there are second chances...

You are living this out, and God's finger is on your life, Ben's, Violet's and Little Baby Forshey's. :)

You are loved!

Herb of Grace said...

Speaking of coffee... I just found a five dollar gift card for Starbucks on my bookshelf!! :D

Hosanna said...

....What is this magical bookshelf, Lis? One that makes gift cards out of thin air? I will have to see this for myself................

Denise said...

Remember to register your card online, Lisi!!! You get all your syrups free, if you get special milk (Breve or Soy) that's free, and if you order just plain brewed coffee, and drink it in store, a refill is free too!

Plus, sometimes randomly, Starbucks will put $5 on your card. Just to be nice!

Seth and Karen's blog said...

Susi,

I cannot express my joy for you, Ben and Violet! Congratulations! You will be in my thoughts and prayers now more than ever. I truly pray you will not have to experience dreaded morning sickness. Keep us posted!

Love,
Karen

Jenny said...

Love and miss you all!!!
Anything you want us to bring you when we come?

Sherry said...

Hey Susi!

Congrats! That's exciting. I'm pregnant too! This is my first though. When is your due date? or do you not know yet? Mine is the 24th of March. I'm assuming yours would be sometime in May maybe? In any case, it's so exciting! I'm happy for you, ans wish you all the best!

Joy said...

Susi, I'm so glad God is the One holding your hand. And that your clinging to it! What an encouragement! I'm so excited for you to have your baby, too. Stay in touch :)